Me, to my wife, after several excellent life-suggestions she’d just given me:
Me, with sincerity, as I exit to go to the washroom: “Wow, ever since [you started using] the CPAP, you’re really on it! I’m just gonna step back and let you make all the decisions…”
W: “Can I get that in writing?”
Me: <long pause> “no.” <quickly closes door behind me>
W: “Damn.”
Me: <from behind door> “so close…”